Engaged after 2 months dating
We knew that when we got married [in the way we did, as quickly as we did] that people would be judgmental, make bets on how long we would last, and think we were absolutely crazy. Me [31 M] with my friends [28-32 M/F] 5-20 years, I ruined my personal relationships during a time when I had a brain tumor. I don't know how to move forward given the things i've done.If you had told me a year ago I was going to be engaged and moving to the other side of the country, I would have LOL'd in your face.I had already executed an exhausting move* from Brooklyn to Nashville, and I thought I was done with change for a very long time.I was about to be homeless, jobless and had no idea what my next move was. I cannot tell you how good it felt to be asked out in person. I don’t think you should persuade someone to marry you in three weeks if the feelings aren’t completely mutual.]For us there was no convincing. It also helped that our values were perfectly aligned. We texted our closest friends on morning of Sunday, July 13th, 2014. We didn’t date for 1 years before he proposed to me on one knee during a trip to the coast.Everything in my life was about to change, and I was drinking a lot. I hadn’t seen or thought about him in nearly a year. My name is Elena.”He turned to me, looked me up and down, and said, “Hey, yeah…I remember you. We told them to meet us at the Chapel of the Bells at 7PM. We didn’t have a long engagement full of planning and stress to throw a lavish wedding for a guest list that is entirely too big.I had made it all on my own, and I was proud that I had done something that many people considered brave. I was not one for relationships at the time I met my now fiancé, a word that still makes me cringe slightly. I was very good at enjoying the company of men without slipping into anything too serious.
Then one night, after eating steak in bed while watching together, I slept over.
It’s just that…some stories are more culturally accepted as normal.
We met late in the summer of 2013 at a mutual friend’s BBQ. Going to that wedding with him, made it very clear to me that I was in love with him. I don’t really know how to put our connection into words. I never really dated a guy that had similar interests as me, had similar style to mine, or that would be considered as ‘my type’. There was one thing that really struck me about him… Since we had so many mutual friends, it was the people around who adored him. You’re then in a constant power struggle for the upper hand in the relationship.
One night my friends and I decided to go see some live music at a local bar. I was feeling pretty tipsy [AKA fearless] so I walked right up to him and said “Hey! After our 2.5 minute wedding ceremony and 0 spent on the marriage certificate and Chapel fees, we got some take-out to eat at our favorite bar, had a couple drinks, got our wedding bands tattooed [for free by a friend] and went home. I moved in with him right after we got hitched, and guess what? We didn’t have a 2-week honeymoon to a tropical island. I suppose I just want you to know that if you love someone and want to spend the rest of your life with them…you need to tell them. Tell them how you feel and that they’re it for you. If you want to marry someone, then marry the fuck out of them and don’t apologize for it.
We didn’t have a registry, receive thousands of dollars, monogrammed towels or knife sets. It’s Don’t feel like you need to do what society expects of you in order to have a lasting, healthy marriage or relationship. We are lucky to live in a country in which you can do whatever you want.